The Sound of Music

My long last, and in a way, forbidden love of the violin seems to be finally materializing itself as it should be. Something tangible and congruent, a reality.

Back in 2007 I bought a cheap violin, according to me to be able to play it and make awesome music. Alas, the only music I was able to make with it was the sound of the case closing and the clicking of the door behind this instrument. At the time I had no formal training in anything about music whatsoever and more than anything I did not have any time. Having class Monday thru Saturday and Sundays off to do catch up work for all of them (22 credits are not that easy when one is a pre-med major).  Needless to say that I lacked the patience and expertise in basic sight reading to be able to play even an open string G.

My brother's sudden interest in the instrument made him acquire a beautiful violin and an awesome new set of skills. Exactly like the kid that starts playing with the discarded toy because the new kid started playing with it, that's exactly how the interested in this instrument flared up again.  Now my brother, as my ever so patience  teacher has allowed me to at least start to develop the skills that allow "mediocrily" play a melody. One thing I do have to say about playing a string instrument. IT FUCKING HURTS!

The tips of my fingers have been in pain for days now from pressing them against the strings. It feels as if the strings are cutting your fingers in half and it burns. The days after it feels like the tips of my fingers are asleep, numb and tingling. It's ALL worth it. I feel the awesome level of accomplishment a child gets from learning to read. All of the sudden I can make sense of a music sheet. It really has open my ears and eyes to a new world.

Besides my fingers hurting, no bitching rant. I'm pleased and very glad that I have found found my love for music that I had lost a while back.  The sound of music has found me; again.

There and Back Again

Since my last post I was pretty much unemployed but then out of nowhere on my own bed, from my phone, I decided to scout the evil realms of internet to look for a job. Needless to say that that same night I had a job and I had to start the very next day :)
I had to pack bread in an assembly line type of work. There was only 3 people in total and there was a lot of work to be done. I kept thinking on how I have a science degree and I have to be in a factory packing bread to be able to afford my education! Seems in a way counter productive since the whole point to go to school is not to do this kind of jobs.  It's only temporary I keep saying to myself.  Well this job seemed pretty good until we had to get payed for all those extra hours we worked.  Well it turns out that these people didn't want to pay the over time, love to give orders to their workers and complained about everything. Not exactly a smart move when all the work is done by the only 3 people they have because you're so cheap to hire someone else. Anyway, all that I could forgive in a way but what I could not take anymore is that they misstreated this 19 year old kid because he was part black. Obviously they didn't say it was because he was black but everytime all of the boss's family and him would just start yelling at him for no reason whatsoever. My boss's dad was very abusive as well to the point that he almost tried to hit the black kid with a cable.  I could not take that anymore, all of the workers, the kid another guy and me, decided to leave that job at the same time. We left and demanded our last pay check. We left them with orders to do for three states that they had to do on their own.
In a way I don't feel bad because people like that only have money because they take advantage of poor people's nesessity, mistreating and abusing, not to mention stealing money from their own workers. Racism was just the cherry on top.
Eitherway, now I'm back on my bed looking for a job again thus the title.
Ps. Glad I'm done with them :)

YouTube, Influences My Life?

    So yet again another post about my "YouTube adventures." Ready, get set, take a deep breath, here we go.  So I was watching videos of an image consulting channel, specifically about how to look "stylish" with a hat. So after seeing all the things this guy had to say I realized that in fact I liked the hats that I had. Which by the way I hated, prior to this video. Well this got me thinking that I actually was influenced by YouTube.
    Is not as bad as it sounds, if you think on it I'm not being influenced by an enterprise but rather by the people I meet on this little universe called the internet. The creepy thing is that they don't even know that I know them but in a way or another that is how they like it. They like the feeling that they have made a difference in someone's life and that someone is watching but they don't want to deal with these people from a day to day basis.  The perfect marriage.
    In one way or another it seems that everytime that I click on the search bar there is a new person willing, at any time of the day I happen to click on them, to teach me what they know.
This got me thinking that it doesnt mean anything bad by saying that I'm being influenced by YouTube because it just means that I was curious enough to look further into things that otherwise I would just shrugged my shoulders and say "I  guess we'll never know."

New year, new aspect on life

So I've been looking at YouTube videos today. Specifically I was watching at the trending videos and found a bunch of channels by Chinese-American kids that although they don't seem to have many friends individually speaking they seem to have a friendship "trans-channel" that many times seems to bring them together in real life, either thru conventions co-starred videos or whatever. I digress but in the mids of everything I found this kid that reminded me of what I used to be like; outgoing sympathetic and overall happiness just exuded out of me.
After watching all of this I saw my own reflection in the mirror and what I saw was, a lonely, depressed looking kid that pretty much looked like a mess :l
On this new year I now have a new outlook on life, and in  way, a new purpose. That is to be myself and not just lay in bed and not do anything with my life. Let's hope that this is not just a "thing" that just passes by but something that seems to stick with me for the better.
BTW now finally I have a room all to myself so perhaps that might help me a to define even more my own individuality and over all myself evolution :)

Sitting, Waiting, In a Bank ... a Post-Christmas Reflexion

Bank's Vault is so "Christmassy" 

So I'm currently in a bank, came to help chiyo resolve an issue with his account, but it seems that he'll b hither for a while so I wanted to post a bit on this blog meanwhile.
Well it seems that there's a lot of people in the bank today, mainly because new year's is coming so they're trying to get all their transactions ready before they close until 2012. Aparently the world is ending then so oh well lol
I keep seeing people coming and depositing tons of money which makes me think "where do this people come up with that much cash?" I've been thinking that perhaps starting a business might be the best thing for me to do, I am tiredof working for stupid bosses that don't know how to manage a business, treat customers and overall mistreat employees. Perhaps is best that I run a business myself and make more than miserable 2 dollars a week and killing myself over it. If I'm running a business for someone I'm at least in need of a freaking raise (perhaps 3 dollars a week :p)
On the bright side my tax return will b coming back soon, hopefully it helps me a little bit...
I have faith that God had something stored for me/my family we WILL be in a better financial situation than the one we are in now. As they say "God squeezes but he doesn't choke" ...ironically with all the debts and things that are happening I don't feel worried at all, optimism? Perhaps but also maybe is my subconscious or faith itself telling me that something better awaits us :)

The Bubble of Non-Reality

 Today I'm typing this entry from a public library.  Sitting here and listening to music on my phone as I type on a public computer and people walking around me, the smell of coffee and fresh made espressos, and the smell of the humid and cold air of December, makes this a very enticing environment to just sit here and type all day. ^_^! Ironically is much more comfortable to be doing this rather than at my house.  It's pretty early but as an university campus should be there is people in the library actually doing work. I have yet to get myself to get another job.  My last job is gone and now I'm here unemployed.  I have been looking at things but I'm not sure everything is just not paying enough and they expect you to give them your soul like "part-time" jobs that are supposed to take just a couple hours from your day but end up consuming your life.  Mainly because the hours that they put you to work are impossible to maintain a life.  For example one shift on Mondays might be from 3PM to 8PM but in the mean time you could not do anything else for the other days because the schedule changes every week so you never can make any plans or get paid enough, yet this people expect you to be able to be there on-call and never able to pay well enough for the overload of things that you must do for them.  Things like this is what a lot of teenagers have to go through in order to pay their expenses since many parents cannot do it for them anymore.  The economy in itself is a delusion of prosperity, the national debt has reached an impossible limit to pay now and the system has been designed to fail.  Yet millions of people still taking advantage of the credit system are making the global economy go into a hyper inflation that will eventually consume the fabric of what the US prides itself in, money.

This bubble of reality that the media and everyone lives in is making this world look towards a gleam future.  point is for now . . . I need to get a job and try to co-exist in this bubble as well as I can possibly do.

the return of the spectre and many other things

  This is going to be a very short rambling since there's really not much to say, kinda like another real quick mention of things just to keep them in the record. ^_^!

So the spectre was returned indeed though for the good news of all, she is staying at random people houses. I guess is a good thing because that way she can't stay there long enough to annoy people. Either way chiyo gets really douchy and possessive-aggressive whenever anyone touches anything that's the specters property.  Litterally, touches them Oo0.  Marucha went home and ironically I think that we're getting better at dealing with each other. For what I hear from Marucha, little snippets here and there her sister is still being a hateful mofo towards me.  What can I say 'haterz gonna hate' lol 


    So aparently Gaddafi is now dead, which makes me worry about what's going to happen next. Retaliation from more terrorists or other countries? Who knows and to be perfectly honest i'm not really sure what this guy did, but I keep hearing that it was nothing that good.  I honestly don't know much about that situation but what I do know is that the generation of today does not want to keep seeing all the hatred and violence.  I keep seeing black kids playing with white kids and random hispanic, asian, etc kids playing together not really caring or discriminating on race. Ironically that doesn't seem to be the case with people in later generations, twenty-somethings and up.  It seems, at least in the US that we finally are reaching a level of assimilation where people are judged by their individuality rather than by their race. We are becoming a society in where not only in theory but also in practice we are judge as individuals rather than stereotypes... keyword is "becoming" since we are not there yet.  Many other countries in the Americas like Mexico, El Salvador, Peru, etc. have already reached a level of homogenization in where people are not judged by race but by the individual.  Kids of european descent and kids of black/native/x race are considered Mexican, Salvadorian, Peruvians, etc. That, makes in those people's populations have a common national identity that you rarely see in the USA. People here still call themselves, Italian, Irish, Chinese, etc. because the national identity of their forefathers was that strong. What about the one of the new generation? These kids are now becoming the new face of the United States. They and only they know how it is to live and grow in the United States. Ironically it seems that there's no structure of a national identity that these kids look towards to. Spongebob, iCarly and movies tell them what is like to be from here.  Many kids and parents don't even know that is disrespectful to have a print of your flag in underwear. The sense of culture is nonexistent in a way that all these cultures mixed together make a gray color of insecurities and a sensorship-trigger-happy media that prevents this country from becoming an actual country rather than a market for culture identities.  


    A new culture is indeed coming out of all this nonsense, let us hope that is one with principles and conviction towards a better future. Free of prejudice and God-willing, free from the bubble of the media.